


We Visited Planet 7C-2 And You Won't Believe Their Food

by classicfirefly



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Gen, Pineapple on Pizza Discourse, another thing i did for a zine, basically a shitpost article, the pancake recipe is legit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-03 01:28:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14557875
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/classicfirefly/pseuds/classicfirefly
Summary: A piece I did for the VLD Galra-centric zine, Imperium!





	We Visited Planet 7C-2 And You Won't Believe Their Food

**We Visited Planet 7C-2 And You Won't Believe Their Food**

_Human Steve calls us Galra Fieri. We aren’t sure what he means._

Here from the Galra Empire, we sent three brave (or foolhardy) folk to travel to Planet 7C-2, where the Voltron paladins hail from - Earth - to try their dishes. Our adventurers: Laenkith, Exonat, and Talvoan. We say it’s… an informative experience. In this issue, we bring six foods and an Earth recipe safe for Galra consumption at home!

* * *

 

The first inhabitant we met was a tiny four-legged creature - a common lizard, according to our information guide. Soon, we managed to find a human - the same species as the Voltron paladins, named Steve Harrington. Spunky name, says Talvoan. His garb consisted of a white shirt and pastel pink shorts, claimed to be the height of fashion among humans.

**6\. Frozen Yogurt (Fro-Yo)**

Plain-looking, but don’t let its simple appearance fool you like it fooled us. It’s mostly milk and sugar, served tastefully in cups. Steve brought us to the store Yogurtland. The fro-yo tastes sweet, the texture soft. Sadly, it’s _way_ too cold, comparable to ice. Laenkith sourly remarked, “It makes my mouth numb. And my head hurts.” Talvoan spat it out immediately with a sharp screech reserved for Galra juveniles and very agitated adults. Exonat silently affixed Steve with a harsh glare, shaking his head. Steve, we note, enjoyed the frozen yogurt with no trouble, stating that we have “brain freeze”. We’re unsure whether the condition is fatal, but Steve refused to confirm our doubts.

 

**5\. Chicken Curry**

From the region of India, Steve said happily. It’s meat in orange sauce and has a distinctive scent. Sniffing, Laenkith backed off from eating it. She ignored Talvoan’s reminders that we were getting paid for this. First, it tasted flavourful and warm, but soon a strong prick of unknown taste stung our tongues. Steve calls it “spice”. It is pain-inducing, very hot, but Exonat gives it plus points for the well-cooked chicken meat (aka the ever-popular Galra pet, the paroqoq.) Sadly, even he cannot stand the spice. Steve had the nerve to capture our faces of disgust and share it as a “meme”. As revenge, Talvoan regurgitated the remnants of the chicken into Steve’s bowl when he wasn't looking.

 

**4\. Big Mac**

Two beef patties, lettuce, cheese, pickles and onions slapped between two pieces of bread, the “burger” uniquely blends a myriad of flavours. It can be purchased at a place called ‘McDonald's’. No idea who that is or why they own so many restaurants - Exonat was horrified as Steve pointed out a statue of “Ronald McDonald”, garishly painted and extremely petrifying. However, it’s definitely a savoury favourite among the humans. We pronounce it far better than the rest of the foods we’ve tried so far, but rank it fourth due to the horror that is Ronald McDonald.

**3\. Chocolate Cake**

Evidently, the Galra need to cultivate the cacao tree. Chocolate, produced from cacao beans, tastes heavenly. We have kwosvon and idaxip cake. Neither can compare with chocolate. Sweet and a little bitter, the flavour is exquisite, pleasantly surprising for a simple-looking cake. Talvoan: “Honestly the only good food Steve has introduced to us that’s worthy of reverence.” “Mmmphhfrmm,” Exonat added helpfully, mouth stuffed with cake. Laenkith stayed silent, swallowing a fourth slice of cake. Truthfully? Pleasure is unspoken.

 

**2\. Hawaiian Pizza**

Pizza: flat round dough topped with tomatoes, cheese, and select ingredients. Hawaiian pizza contains ham and pineapples. Sweet and savoury usually don’t go together, but Hawaiian pizza pulls it off amazingly. We don’t know why humans detest this sweet yellow fruit when served on pizza, but it’s delectable. Our more controversial opinion on pineapple insulted Steve Harrington, who loathes Hawaiian pizza. Pity.

**1\. Pancakes**

They’re lacking life’s great essential. Who, you may ask? The Galra reading this, of course. We refer to pancakes, which are singularly divine in ensnaring senses. They’re flat cakes, stacked and drizzled with syrup or chocolate sauce, topped with butter or fruits. The aroma alone was enough to make us salivate. Laenkith was the only one intelligible enough to comment between mouthfuls: “Get...mmphrmm...recipe...now.” Faithfully, we sourced a recipe from a famous Earth chef - Gordon Ramsay!

* * *

 

**PANCAKE RECIPE**

INGREDIENTS

4 Eggs

2 tsp Sugar

1 tsp Salt

4 tsp Baking powder

120ml Vegetable oil

1/2l of Whole milk

320g Flour

2tsp Vanilla essence

COOKING

1\. Separate egg whites from yolks. Whisk until foamy.

2\. Mix all other ingredients together.

3\. Fold in egg whites.

4\. Heat small frying pan on the hob.

5\. Ladle one batch of the mixture into the saucepan and swirl around so it covers the surface evenly.

6\. Cook until browned, then flip with a spatula.

7\. Continue until all batter is used.

8\. Serve and enjoy!


End file.
